And here goes #3...(it's a sappy one!)

This morning as I was putting on my jacket, I saw a photo of my grandparents and me (yes, that is proper grammar, Jonathan!) from 2002. I see the photo every day as it is sitting on the green shelves that I acquired from them last year, but today, it made me pause a couple of extra seconds to study it. The photo was taken at their 50th wedding anniversary and we were throwing them a surprise party. I even flew into Dallas on the first anniversary of September 11th for them! I was scared so it was a big deal to me.

The look on Gramma's face in this picture is priceless. It's a look of utter and pure joy. And what made her so incredibly happy? The fact that 3 of her daughters (and their husbands) and 3 of her granddaughters took the time to make this day so very special to her. She was so happy to just be with family on her wedding anniversary. In every picture we have of her from that night, she is beaming from ear to ear...and I love her for that priceless look of joy.

Right now, Gramma has Stage 6 Alzheimer's and is quickly heading to the final stage. It's a horrible disease and we are the unfortunate bystanders that have to witness her lose all the personality and spunk that made her who she was when I was growing up. My mom started a blog a year ago and dedicated the first several months to her "book," Ellyland. Feel free to read through her blog, which chronicles our family's journey through the different stages of Alzheimer's with my grandma.

I have not handled this very well as I was very close to Gramma. In fact, this is the first time I have really been able to talk about it at length without completely losing it. But, I am still tearing up. It's hard. I was my grandma's first grandchild and we both lived in DFW (well, mostly...they moved a couple of times) when I was growing up. I can remember countless nights spent at her house with her doing every single thing I ever wanted to do. She spoiled me rotten.

However, the real reason I mention all of this is because I have decided that my third resolution is to truly appreciate my family for who they are...flaws and all! Don't get me wrong, I do appreciate my family and always have. My parents are awesome and I think they raised me to be a pretty great person. I love all the members of my family (even the ones who refuse to be part of it) and there's not much I wouldn't do to make them happy. I'm a pleaser like, despite my constant need for independence.

But, and I'm sure we've all been there, sometimes I would just rather do something else besides hang out with my parents...or put myself through the (self-imposed) emotional ringer by visiting my grandparents...or whatever else it might be. I love going to dinner with my girlfriends and I love hanging out in my pajamas with Jonathan and there's times when that sounds more appealing to me than doing "family stuff."

But if the past few years have taught me anything, it's that family will be there for you whenever you need them to be. And, and they won't be there forever. Family members will die before you do and then you are left without them for the rest of your days. Each family member can offer you something that nobody else can and when they are gone, that gift that they hold is gone. Parents are there as only parents can be. Cousins are there for the emotional rollercoaster that is growing up (in essence, they are the ones you learn about life with). Aunts and uncles can provide you with that advice that you don't want from your parents...but need from an adult. Everyone can give you the funniest stories of your life. Trust me, my family has a lot!

And we all need that. Especially me. So, I am not going to just appreciate my family because I have to, not because it's expected of me, but because I want to. We are weird bunch (every single one of us will admit that) and there are things in life we don't agree on (politics, religion, etc.), but I kinda like it the way it is. My family is the perfect family for me.